Lately it has been a season of loneliness for me. I often struggle with fitting in or feeling I belong. I never have felt I really belong here(here being Illinois). It has been almost 8 years and I have yet to have the intimacy of a friendship, sure I have a bunch of people I know from Church and other places but there is no one I feel comfortable sharing my heart with and yet here I am writing where a bunch of people have the opportunity to read what is on my heart, ironic huh? Through these seasons of loneliness God has always reminded me that this is not my "home" that my real home is heaven and I am just a visitor here on earth. I suppose his reminder is to help me long for heaven and in turn dig deeper in my relationship with him longing to be with him for eternity. I am not sure what I would do without him on days like today where the isolation and loneliness grips my heart and brings me down.
Psalm 119:49-50 Says
49 Remember your word to your servant,
for you have given me hope.
50 My comfort in my suffering is this:
Your promise preserves my life.
I praise the Lord for his promises to me, my Hope is in him alone.
