grace

This year has been incredibly difficult. In fact I cannot remember things being this tough since the days we were going through infertility treatments and the loss of our Aj. I am still healing from a lot of the things that happened and still healing from a lot of words that were spoken with good intentions but left me with a scorched heart.

Proverbs 12:18

The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.

This year like all the rest of the difficult times has taught me something and spiritually speaking I grew up. Less Pharisee and more like Jesus. Yes worth it. I say that knowing the person who raped my sister is still out on the street, I say that knowing people misjudged the situation and spoke gossip, I say that in spite of being hurt by friends who chose to care more for the lives they were living then to pray with me and for me.
The misconception that I live a perfect life but truth my life would be nothing and I would not be able to overcome the search for justice, forgive those that hurt me, walk on after my world was rattled without Jesus. Jesus offers grace. Jesus offers life. Jesus offers himself.

grace. God's amazing grace has been a theme this year. The things of worth are never easy but always worth it. Forgiveness isn't easy but it is always worth it.

Learning to ride

Grace has been working on learning to ride her bike on two wheels. Watching her yesterday I realized how we take for granted this accomplishment. She wanted to be able to do it in one day, without practice and without learning to balance. It was a good lesson in perseverance. She got to the point where Daddy would let go and she would make it about four peddles. I think these sort of lessons are not only for the child but that God gives them also for the parent as in Myself. I always wondered why my Dad used his kids in his sermons growing up, now I know.

Old as Indians

Grace is learning about Indians in History I suppose that is what led her thinking in this conversation she and I had before bed this week.

This was too good not to share. Putting Grace to bed Grace says "I get to have chick fil a tomorrow yay!" looking over at her whiled I rubbed Jonah I said " I wish I could have some too." Grace paused "because they didn't have schools when you were little" me trying not to be offended that my child just referred to me as old "am I really that old?" I asked. Grace exclaimed  "not as old as the Indians that is Daddy!

Now it is a pretty well known fact that I am actually older than my husband but obviously Grace doesn't care or doesn't realize that quite yet. It's ok really, hearing her call her Dad old was priceless. I thought I would have to wait until she was at least ten but nope. I will have to remember to thank her for the laugh.

Dear Jonah

Grace had a thankfulness writing assignment for school. Her letter was so sweet.

Dear Jonah,
I want to thank you for being my brother. I want to thank you for playing with me after school. I want to thank you for giving me presents, love Grace F.(that is what she is called in school)

A lesson from Grace

I came in one night to tuck Grace into bed. To my surprise she sat there on her bed with her Father's large Bible sitting on her lap. I asked what she was doing thinking her reply probably was a homework assignment or something her Teacher asked her to do. "I'm just reading," she said "I wanted to read about Moses." I think my heart leapt for joy. My little first grader was reading the word of God on her own free will!

Her new faith in Christ is teaching me so many things in my own relationship with the Lord. To desire him more, to trust him with my whole self, to walk day by day with our savior and to show Christ to others. Much like Grace I also became a Christian at an early age and looking back it has been hard to pin point a life changing moment like a lot of Christians I know have. My testimony is not dramatic. Watching Grace is like God giving me the gift of seeing what my conversion might of looked like. Now that I am in my 30's it is harder to remember growing in Christ in my younger days except for that one moment playing hide n seek with my brother when I asked Jesus into my heart. That memory has lasted. That moment was life changing and even though it is not something that gets wows and exclamations when told, I now see the awe inspiring work God has gradually done in my life, just as he is doing for my daughter. That is a treasure!

The Haircut

Grace has been growing her hair since birth minus a few trims a long the way. Over the holiday weekend we took her to get it cut since she has been asking for a hair cut since she started first grade. It turned out nicely and she is caring for it a lot better.

Grace is enjoying first grade. She is also looking forward to playing soccer this Spring. It has been fun watching her grow in her faith and set a good example to her siblings. She is a treasure.

About Grace...

Every year I say I will be healthier, I will work out more, eat less, drink more water. This year I am not saying those things. This year I am setting a spiritual goal because one thing I know is when my spirit is healthy the rest follows.

Something struck me on Christmas day as we learned of a young women passing on just before the service started. Our Pastor's wife asked us to pray and as we finished praying my young daughter Grace was on her knees. My six year old daughter was on her knees before God with blind faith. What a testimony. I asked her after the service was over why she was on her knees. She said "just praying". How God used her in my life. What an example to me of crying out to God. What a testimony of where I need to be before God. What a reminder of Mark 10:13:16

13 One day some parents brought their children to Jesus so he could touch and bless them. But the disciples scolded the parents for bothering him.

14 When Jesus saw what was happening, he was angry with his disciples. He said to them, “Let the children come to me. Don’t stop them! For the Kingdom of God belongs to those who are like these children. 15 I tell you the truth, anyone who doesn’t receive the Kingdom of God like a child will never enter it.” 16 Then he took the children in his arms and placed his hands on their heads and blessed them.

New Living Translation.

Grace has told us that one night in October she asked Jesus to be her Savior. Just like she quietly got on her knees, in the quiet of her bed just her and her God she came to him asking to be saved, receiving her free gift of salvation. We've seen her grow coming out of school and exclaiming "I want to tell everyone about Jesus!" and in her attitude towards her siblings. I do not know what God has in store for her life. My one and only prayer is that she will continue to walk with abandon with her savior and continue to be a light to not only myself but the rest of the world.

On the first day of first grade

Our Grace started first grade yesterday! It is SO hard to believe I have a first grader. She is growing to be a wonderful girl and a very good big sister but above all is loving to learn about Jesus.

Celebration number six

Today marks Grace's sixth birthday! Yes that is me in the picture in my skinnier days. Our first child. She is just finishing up Kindergarten and loves it. She is quite the reader now and loves to try to teach her younger siblings. She is much like her Mom and is shy when you first meet her, then she will gain your trust and open up more and more. She loves the outdoors and playing cars and house with Jonah. She also loves to write...takes after someone else I know. We are blessed to be her parents. I am blessed to her Mom, she challenges me with bedtime spiritual questions like "Mom what is heaven like?" what a special gift to be able to make her Mom think and remind her of Christ.

 But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, ⁵ made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved.

Ephesians 2: 4 & 5

New Car, New Clothes

Eric has been asking Grace what she would like to do for her Mom on Mother's Day. Her first answer has me wondering, she said "some pretty clothes". I am not sure if I should be offended or questioning my less than stellar clothing attire. Hmm...out of the mouths of babes right?

Eric asked her again last night what she wanted to do. I liked this answer much more. She said "a new car!" So she has set the bar pretty high this Mother's day but not even new clothes or a new car could make me happier than being her Mom. I will treasure in my heart the little look on her face as she whispered  her answers into her Daddy's ear. Yes I have much to be thankful for.